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Got Milk? |
Todd - Prior to this year's visit, the only things I could recall about Black Orchard was that it was 1) mostly a barn, 2) it was crazy loud and 3) there was a lot of bird worship and 4) it was SUPER loud (again). We heard that the haunt had been reworked since last season and that it was worth re-visiting. I am extremely glad we did. There were a vast amount of improvements and enhancements from last year. While a many of the indoor scenes were the same, the execution in and around them is really where the haunt shined this year.
Black Orchard stands as a meat processing facility owned by the Black family. Naturally, the source of the meat is questionable. Even more odd is this family's devotion to the vultures which are regarded as a higher, ethereal being (or something). As we entered, we were greeted by Atticus, head of the Vulture "congregation" (or as I call it, batshit crazy cult), who has explained that he has been expunged from the family and that is cousin Lester is now in charge. Atticus said he is back to claim what is rightfully his and to pass this message along to Lester. Sure, why not. As we approached the main building, a girl digging graves with a spoon (whatever works I guess) said she accidentally buried some pages of a book. Armed with said spoon, I dug up a page for her upon request. Once she learned we were going inside, she noted her professional services would be needed and she would "make room for us."
And then there was the milkman.
I don't even know where to start with this guy. From the instant he ran up on us, milk was dripping out of his mouth as he spoke, quite hurried as if there as more in that metal pale he drank from than just milk. He was very insistent that we try his milk. He promised it was fresh and indeed he spoke the truth. A little further towards the building we found him pumping himself (from the breast) the next batch of which he insisted we take a taste.
Do not make the mistake I did and reveal you are lactose intolerant. This does not bode well with the milkman. "You're not tolerant of my lac-a-tose?!" he screamed. After a bit more harassment we were sent inside.
After ringing the bell for service, a we were greeted by a nice enough woman who offered us the freshest chopped meat instantly. I was the only one who accepted the offer and the slimiest, giggliest meat was dumped in my hand. She demonstrated it was completely editable, however I chose not to partake. Immediately following, she told us she had lost a finger while cooking and proceeded to have Emily fish it out of a pan for her that looked to have various meat scraps and one long piece of poop half submerged in water in it. Emily strategically uncovered the finger without touching anything directly and we advanced on.
Eventually we found Lester who told us he is now in charge after Brother Stitch Black died and we need to reiterate that to Atticus. He also said that chickens are now the true beings to praise. He asked us to shout "I believe in the chicken!" loudly to help get the message out. Eh...I've seen stranger beliefs. Next was a room where a short film about their odd bird worship was played for us, indoctrination-style. This was a very cool touch to this bizarre aspect of the backstory. Unfortunately the hosting actor was speaking over the video making it hard to understand either one of them.
Again, the interior of the haunt felt largely the same, though there was much less blaring music throughout. It was evident at times, but it wasn't so loud we couldn't hear the actors which I distinctly remember being an issue last year. The most memorable room from last year was still there - the pitch black room lit only by the occasional camera flash, whining with each recharge. It's a very cool effect I haven't seen anywhere else.
Black Orchard brings a welcome balance between off the wall humor and and primal threat. The first opening segments had us laughing out loud but the deeper we went inside, the darker the vibe got. There's a lot of suggestion to butchering, slicing, chainsawing and well, it shouldn't be a surprise considering it is supposed to be a small family owned meat house. Add that to the dirty, dusty and dank environment and it plays to the most realistic, tangible threat - not ghosts or goblins, but crazed people...who apparently worship vultures. And Chickens.
Kudos to a big turnaround on this haunt and great actors! If next year they decide their god is a potato, I'm going to lose it.
Black Orchard stands as a meat processing facility owned by the Black family. Naturally, the source of the meat is questionable. Even more odd is this family's devotion to the vultures which are regarded as a higher, ethereal being (or something). As we entered, we were greeted by Atticus, head of the Vulture "congregation" (or as I call it, batshit crazy cult), who has explained that he has been expunged from the family and that is cousin Lester is now in charge. Atticus said he is back to claim what is rightfully his and to pass this message along to Lester. Sure, why not. As we approached the main building, a girl digging graves with a spoon (whatever works I guess) said she accidentally buried some pages of a book. Armed with said spoon, I dug up a page for her upon request. Once she learned we were going inside, she noted her professional services would be needed and she would "make room for us."
And then there was the milkman.
I don't even know where to start with this guy. From the instant he ran up on us, milk was dripping out of his mouth as he spoke, quite hurried as if there as more in that metal pale he drank from than just milk. He was very insistent that we try his milk. He promised it was fresh and indeed he spoke the truth. A little further towards the building we found him pumping himself (from the breast) the next batch of which he insisted we take a taste.
Do not make the mistake I did and reveal you are lactose intolerant. This does not bode well with the milkman. "You're not tolerant of my lac-a-tose?!" he screamed. After a bit more harassment we were sent inside.
After ringing the bell for service, a we were greeted by a nice enough woman who offered us the freshest chopped meat instantly. I was the only one who accepted the offer and the slimiest, giggliest meat was dumped in my hand. She demonstrated it was completely editable, however I chose not to partake. Immediately following, she told us she had lost a finger while cooking and proceeded to have Emily fish it out of a pan for her that looked to have various meat scraps and one long piece of poop half submerged in water in it. Emily strategically uncovered the finger without touching anything directly and we advanced on.
Eventually we found Lester who told us he is now in charge after Brother Stitch Black died and we need to reiterate that to Atticus. He also said that chickens are now the true beings to praise. He asked us to shout "I believe in the chicken!" loudly to help get the message out. Eh...I've seen stranger beliefs. Next was a room where a short film about their odd bird worship was played for us, indoctrination-style. This was a very cool touch to this bizarre aspect of the backstory. Unfortunately the hosting actor was speaking over the video making it hard to understand either one of them.
Again, the interior of the haunt felt largely the same, though there was much less blaring music throughout. It was evident at times, but it wasn't so loud we couldn't hear the actors which I distinctly remember being an issue last year. The most memorable room from last year was still there - the pitch black room lit only by the occasional camera flash, whining with each recharge. It's a very cool effect I haven't seen anywhere else.
Black Orchard brings a welcome balance between off the wall humor and and primal threat. The first opening segments had us laughing out loud but the deeper we went inside, the darker the vibe got. There's a lot of suggestion to butchering, slicing, chainsawing and well, it shouldn't be a surprise considering it is supposed to be a small family owned meat house. Add that to the dirty, dusty and dank environment and it plays to the most realistic, tangible threat - not ghosts or goblins, but crazed people...who apparently worship vultures. And Chickens.
Kudos to a big turnaround on this haunt and great actors! If next year they decide their god is a potato, I'm going to lose it.
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Got milk? (also) |
Paul - Black Orchard is a terrifying place...
It was pretty late and very dark both times we've been to Black Orchard. You drive a long way, down some really dark roads, then park in a grass parking lot with no lights. As you approach Black Orchard you're surrounded by darkness, and even though you eventually come into an area with some lights, you never seem to fully escape that darkness.
Inside that building is a group of people(?) who some would refer to as a cult. They don't seem to like that term, but will they do? Get Mad? (Too late!)
They're some frightening characters, living in the dark barn, in the dark ruralness of the middle of nowhere. Why are you there? What do you want? Do you really think you'll be safe? You start to second-guess your decisions a bit.
Do you like milk? Do you like meat? Do you like birds? What about life itself? If you survive this, you may change your ways. You may start collecting empty milk jars, or bird feathers, or ground up meat. You may start living in the darkness yourself, or forming your own group of followers (don't call it a cult!)
Black Orchard is a terrifying place. And it will change you.
It was pretty late and very dark both times we've been to Black Orchard. You drive a long way, down some really dark roads, then park in a grass parking lot with no lights. As you approach Black Orchard you're surrounded by darkness, and even though you eventually come into an area with some lights, you never seem to fully escape that darkness.
Inside that building is a group of people(?) who some would refer to as a cult. They don't seem to like that term, but will they do? Get Mad? (Too late!)
They're some frightening characters, living in the dark barn, in the dark ruralness of the middle of nowhere. Why are you there? What do you want? Do you really think you'll be safe? You start to second-guess your decisions a bit.
Do you like milk? Do you like meat? Do you like birds? What about life itself? If you survive this, you may change your ways. You may start collecting empty milk jars, or bird feathers, or ground up meat. You may start living in the darkness yourself, or forming your own group of followers (don't call it a cult!)
Black Orchard is a terrifying place. And it will change you.
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Fine, I will take the milk! |
Emily - The Black Orchard location is the perfect haunt setting. The dark, secluded field is scary enough, but the staff make it even worse! The ticket boot, line, and beginning sets are outdoors. As you’re led through the woods, a graveyard, and around the side of the slaughter house, the congregation members begin the torment before you can even enter the building!
The actors definitely made this place great. The roaming actors were very engaging and kept us entertained when not inside the haunt. The milk man was relentless and would not take no for an answer. Once inside, I helped a lady dig for her finger in a bloody stew, which she then washed down with some milk. My favorite set of any haunt is still that photoflash room. Strobes don’t compare to the unique experience that simple light effect has. I love it, but I also really hate it.
While set in a location where no one would ever know what happened if a cannibalistic cult decided to process you, Black Orchard really is an enjoyable haunt. Plus, if you make it out, you might get a souvenir milk jug!
The actors definitely made this place great. The roaming actors were very engaging and kept us entertained when not inside the haunt. The milk man was relentless and would not take no for an answer. Once inside, I helped a lady dig for her finger in a bloody stew, which she then washed down with some milk. My favorite set of any haunt is still that photoflash room. Strobes don’t compare to the unique experience that simple light effect has. I love it, but I also really hate it.
While set in a location where no one would ever know what happened if a cannibalistic cult decided to process you, Black Orchard really is an enjoyable haunt. Plus, if you make it out, you might get a souvenir milk jug!
Questions? Have a story to share? Leave it in the comments!